Program 90: The Secret to a Successful Marriage

Marriage joins two into one. Learn the secret to a lasting, joy-filled oneness that honors Yahuwah.

Welcome to WLC Radio, a subsidiary of World’s Last Chance Ministries, an online ministry dedicated to learning how to live in constant readiness for the Savior's return.

For two thousand years, believers of every generation have longed to be the last generation. Contrary to popular belief, though, Christ did not give believers “signs of the times” to watch for. Instead, he repeatedly warned that his coming would take even the faithful by surprise. Yahushua urgently warned believers to be ready because, he said, “The Son of Man is coming at an hour you do not expect.” [Matthew 24:44]

WLC Radio: Teaching minds and preparing hearts for Christ's sudden return.

Part 1: (Miles & Dave)

Miles Robey: Hello! Welcome to World’s Last Chance Radio. I’m Miles Robey, your host, and with me is the happily married, Dave Wright!

Dave Wright: I am happily married; very happily. And that’s what we’re going to talk about today.

Miles: What, your marriage?

Dave: Not mine, but marriage itself. Marriage was intended to be a blessing—and it can be. It can also be, well, sheer hell on earth.

Miles: I recently read an interesting divorce statistic. Divorce rates in the west have been quite high for some time. For example, in the United States, approximately 50% of all marriages end in divorce.

Dave: That’s high.

Miles: Yeah. And we’ve generally tended to assume that in the more traditional, or otherwise conservative cultures to the east that there are fewer divorces.

Dave: Yes. Culture would play a large role in that.

Miles: But here’s the thing: divorce rates are rising all over. In Saudi Arabia alone, divorce rates in 2012 increased to over 30,000. That’s 82 divorces a day! Or about three divorces an hour.

Dave: In Saudi Arabia.

Miles: Yep. And they’ve only increased since. Gulfnews.com reported that there were 35,000 divorce cases in 2015, and 40,000 in 2016. Arabnews.com reported that divorce in the kingdom averaged 5 divorces every hour.

Dave: Wow. That’s a lot for that size of country.

Miles: That’s not all. The divorce rate in China is also increasing at an alarming rate. Although it’s low compared to other countries, it is increasing exponentially, and when something increases exponentially …?

Dave: It doesn’t take long to reach alarming levels.

Miles: Right. So, knowing that Yahuwah intended marriage to be a blessing, let’s talk about the secret to having a successful marriage. What can you tell us?

Dave: A good marriage definitely is a blessing. In fact, the relationship between Christ and his people is frequently presented in Scripture as a loving groom and his bride.

But before we get started on that, let me just say, for the benefit of any first time listeners, at WLC we refer to the Creator by His personal name, Yahuwah (as Miles just did), or Yah.

The divine name is actually a verb-of-being, so in that sense, it becomes it’s own promise. The Father will … be … whatever you need Him to be to you.

The Saviour’s name is quite similar to His Father’s name. It’s Yahushua, which means “Yahuwah saves.”

Miles: El and eloah are Hebrew titles. They’re the equivalent of “lord” in English.

Elohim is also a title frequently used in Scripture and refers to the Father.

Dave: Have you heard of Lynn Fontanne and Alfred Lunt?

Miles: No. Doesn’t sound familiar.

Dave: Well, probably because they were before your time. Lynn Fontanne and Alfred Lunt were actors. And not just any actors. They were huge stars on Broadway, considered Broadway’s preeminent couple of the stage. They even worked together a lot.

Now, marriages among actors aren’t typically known for their longevity.

Miles: Hardly! Fifteen years in Hollywood is like 50 years for anyone else.

Dave: Well, one time a reporter asked Ms. Fontanne what was their secret of success for such a long and successful marriage. (They were married for 55 years, until Alfred Lunt’s death.)

Ms. Fontanne’s answer has always intrigued me.

Miles: What’d she say?

Dave: It was very simple. She said: “We’ve never allowed ourselves to be rude to the other person.”

Miles: Wow. Simple but profound.

Dave: How many people save their best treatment for friends—

Miles: “Company” manners.

Dave: –only to treat their own family with impatience, discourtesy, and disrespect.

Miles: Yep. You see it a lot. And then they wonder why they’re closer to their friends than their family.

Dave: But that’s not what Yah intended marriage to be! Marriage was the crowning gift of Creation!

The Father worked to create a perfect world. Everything we needed for health, everything to delight the senses and fascinate the minds, He made! And then He said: “It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.” [Genesis 2:18]

Miles: Having an intimate relationship, an intimate friendship with the person that is “bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh” really is a gift.

Dave: I believe it was given for two reasons. First, to bless the human race by molding us into the image of the divine. A truly successful marriage requires selfless giving on both parts. It doesn’t work if only one selflessly gives. It requires both, giving each the opportunity to gain important character development.

Secondly, a good marriage relationship reveals to all created beings the loving character of Yahuwah.

Miles: So, you think this is why Yah created humans to be two parts of one whole? We all know Genesis 1:27 which says: “Elohim created man in his own image, in the image of Elohim created he him; male and female created he them.” But typically, there’s kind of this attitude that men were created a little more in the image of Yah than women.

Dave: I know what you mean and you’re right. But it’s unfortunate. It takes both men and women to reveal the divine character. And the union of a man and woman reveals facets of Yah’s character that just wouldn’t be understood otherwise.

Miles: “For this cause shall a man leave his father and mother, and shall be joined unto his wife, and they two shall be one flesh.” [Ephesians 5:31]

Dave: Exactly. This is why, when two people are equally committed to honoring their Maker, their marriage is a powerful witness in the world.

Yahuwah-centered marriages both glorify Yah and are a blessing to others. Satan knows this and this is why he’s focused so intently upon destroying individual marriages and, really, marriage itself as an institution.

Right now, let’s take a look at some of the reasons people give for marrying. Why did you get married?

Miles: Well, I loved her! I found the woman that truly seemed to “get” me and who loved me in return.

Dave: That’s a good reason for marrying. But people get married for a variety of reasons. Sometimes it’s romantic:

• She’s my soul mate.
• I’m in love with him.

Other reasons are practical:

• Marrying her will advance my career.
• He’ll be a good provider.

That sort of thing.

Miles: I think society can play a big role in that, too. If a person’s getting older, or gets pregnant out of wedlock … Yeah. There can be a lot of pressure to conform to social mores.

Dave: The reason it’s important to analyze why you got—or want to get—married is because your marriage will only be as strong as the reason for which you got married in the first place.

Miles: Wow!

Dave: Listen while I say that again: your marriage will only be as strong as the reason why you got married in the first place.

Miles: So, in a very real sense, your purpose for marrying really establishes the course of your marriage.

Dave: And the more solid your reason for marrying, the stronger will be your marriage, and the more enjoyment you’ll get from it.

Miles: I’m sure the converse would be true, too: the poorer your reason for marrying, the greater your chances of unhappiness and, ultimately, divorce.

Dave: Exactly. To have a lasting marriage that’s a blessing to both parties, you must have a good reason for getting married.

Now. Scripture teaches that only Yah is “good.” So, anything that is good must be consistent with Yahuwah, right?

Miles: Right.

Dave: The only “good” reason for getting married, then, is that both individuals believe it’s Yahuwah’s will for their lives.

Miles: Now, I’m assuming this doesn’t mean you can marry who you want and then ask Yahuwah to bless your choice.

Dave: No. This means surrendering your will to Yah and allowing Him to guide you in your selection of a life mate.

The ultimate goal of joining together in marriage is for the two of you to become “one flesh.” Now, even if your original reason for getting married wasn’t a very good one, it’s still possible to grow beyond that and, with Yahuwah’s blessing, ground your marriage on a solid foundation.

Miles: Well, yeah. Anyone, at any time, can choose to rededicate themselves to Yah, so it stands to reason a couple could, too.

Dave: You do this, He’s going to bless your efforts and your union can glorify Him.

The principle on which marriage is based is summed up in Genesis 2, verse 24. Would you read that for us?

Miles: “Therefore a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.”

Dave: Your joy in the marriage is in proportion to how melded together in “one flesh” you and your spouse are under Yahuwah’s blessing. Likewise, the pain and unhappiness experienced are in proportion to the disunion experienced in marriage.

Miles: Hmm. I never really thought about it that way, but it really makes sense.

Dave: Satan knows this. It’s why he’s done his best to destroy the happiness of multitudes by leading couples to become “one” in ways that are unhealthy or are prone to abuse.

We all seek to become “one” when we get married. However, the way you attempt to become “one” will either make or break your marriage.

If the right method is used, your marriage will grow stronger and the two of you will grow closer. If the wrong method’s used, you’ll grow further and further apart as your marriage grows weaker and weaker.

A guy by the name of Gregory Jackson has done extensive research into what constitutes true Biblical marriage principles. His research reveals three basic methods widely used by which couples attempt to become “one.” I’d like to go over them. Each of these methods has strengths and weaknesses, but none are ideal.

Only one method, the fourth, is in alignment with other divine principles and will lead to true and lasting happiness.

Miles: Sounds interesting! Go for it.

Dave: Jackson illustrates the various methods people use to become “one” by using three different mathematical methods to arrive at the number one. These methods are: addition, subtraction and division.

Let’s take a look at the addition method. Obviously, a person can’t be represented by a zero, so the addition method uses fractions to add up to one: ½ + ½ = 1.

This model of marriage is used by people who believe they’re not complete unless they have another person in their lives.

Miles: I’ve known people like that. They believe that in order to be fulfilled in life, they must have a life-partner.

Dave: It’s unfortunate because the truth is, only Yah can provide the level of fulfillment they’re wanting.

Jackson gives three reasons why the addition method can’t bring a couple into true oneness. I’ve got his book here. Would you read the marked passage, please?

Miles:

First, the addition method causes one to depend on the wrong source to feel complete. The word of [Yah] says:

“Beware lest any man spoil you through philosophy and vain deceit, after the tradition of men, after the rudiments of the world, and not after Christ. For in him dwelleth all the fullness of the Godhead bodily. Ye are complete in him
[Yahushua], which is the head of all principality and power.” (Colossians 2:8-10)

The addition method spoils us because it teaches us to depend on someone other than . . . [Yahushua] to feel complete.

Secondly, the addition method causes one to have the wrong purpose for marriage. [Yahuwah’s] purpose for marriage is to develop His image and likeness in us. For those who follow the addition method the purpose for marriage is to feel complete.

Thirdly, the addition method causes one to use the wrong kind of love to relate to his or her spouse. Those who use this method relate to each other with a self-centered, selfish love because their purpose is to get the other to minister to their needs. [Yahuwah’s] love is an other-centered, selfless love because its purpose is to minister to others’ needs.

Unquote. Hm. This is really insightful.

Dave: Couples who model their marriage after the addition method do so from a mutual need to feel complete. This is problematic because you’re only going to feel complete through Yahuwah.

Miles: I can see how, looking to your spouse for completion would be wrong because it focuses your attention on a human, rather than Yah.

Dave: And, such love is self-oriented, rather than other-oriented, which is the basis for Yahuwah’s love and for true oneness.

Now, the subtraction method of becoming one achieves oneness by taking away a smaller number from a higher number

Miles: Two minus one, equals one.

Dave: This is the method that’s most prone to abuse and taking advantage of one partner. Couples who use the subtraction method believe that one must dominate the other.

Sometimes men use this method to exert control over their wives. They say things like “I wear the pants in this family! I am the head of this house and you must obey me!”

Miles: It’s not just abusive men, though. I’ve seen women use it as an excuse to not think (and study) for themselves.

For example, you share a new concept with a woman who thinks on the subtraction method and her response will often be, “My husband is so much better at figuring out that sort of thing. I’ll see what he says.”

Dave: Like couples who use the addition method to fulfill a mutual need, couples who use the subtraction method to achieve oneness do so from a mutual need to feel powerful and in control—even if that feeling comes from partnering with those they perceive as powerful.

But the subtraction method fails for the same reasons as the addition method: it depends on the wrong source (one’s spouse) for meeting the need to feel strong and powerful. Because this is the wrong reason for getting married, the wrong kind of love is exhibited in trying to achieve oneness.

Miles: This is a really intriguing way to look at it. We’re going to take a short break and when we return, I’d like to hear about the division method. We’ll be right back.

* * *

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* * *Part 2: (Miles & Dave)

Miles: I would never have thought of marriage relationships in terms of mathematical models, but I can really see this. What’s the division method?

Dave: The division method is probably the most popular method used by young people today. Of the three, it’s the best. It’s got a lot of positives going for it, but even the division method’s not ideal. I’ve got another quote here from Gregory Jackson I’d like you to read.

Just … yeah, right there at the arrow.

Miles:

The addition method comes to the number one by joining two incompletes, the subtraction method comes to the number one by subjecting a lesser to a greater, but the division method comes to the number one by bringing together two equals. Division teaches, a number divided by an equal number will result in the number one.

For example, 4 ÷ 4 = 1. Married couples who use the division method believe marriage should be a union of equals. They do not need marriage to feel complete or powerful and in control. They are self-reliant people with a healthy self-concept. They are not opposed to the idea of marriage, but they feel they can survive and find happiness without it. The idea of marriage is appealing to them when it offers a way to be an equal partner in life with someone who has the same economic and educational goals (Some add spiritual goals to the list.). They believe the best way to come to the number one is by bringing two equals together.

Dave: You can see that this is actually a pretty good way for two people who love each other to become “one flesh.”

Miles: Well, yeah. This sounds really good. I’m not seeing why this would be such a bad thing. It actually sounds a lot like our marriage. What’s the problem with it?

Dave: The division method is the best of the three types of marriage models, but it still fails for the same reasons as the previous methods: it looks to the wrong source for feeling like an equal, thus it has the wrong reason for getting married and as a result, the wrong kind of love is expressed in this marriage.

Miles: Sooo … what’s the best method for becoming one, then?

Dave: The very best method for becoming “one flesh” in your marriage is by using the exponential model to arrive at one.

Miles: Uhhh …You’ve stumped me. How do you relate that to marriage?

Dave: All right. Quick recap.

In addition, you’ve got one-half plus one-half equals one. Right?

Miles: Right.

Dave: In subtraction, you start with two, but you take away one to arrive at one. In division, you have two divided by two equaling one.

But in an exponential marriage, as in exponential math, two individuals, whether they’re persons or numbers, are joined together in such a way that the overall value of both is increased and enhanced.

… You’ve still got a question mark on your face.

I’m going to let Gregory Jackson explain it. Hear. Read this page.

Miles: All right, uh … quote:

[I]n exponential math one is raised to the power of two. In every other mathematical method the number one is either lessened or duplicated by the number to which it relates, but in exponential math the number one is increased by the number to which it relates. It is not increased in numerical value; it is increased in its power. When you look at it you see the number one, but when you feel its impact you feel the number two. It is one that has the power of two. [Yahuwah’s] method of becoming one is two complete people joining to form a greater one. They move through life as one, but their impact on life has the power of two. When two become one as [Yahuwah] intended, life does not get worse, neither does it remain the same; it gets better.

In order for the exponential model of oneness to work, both spouses must be complete or whole before they become one. They cannot come to the relationship to receive; they must come to give. Each must bring his or her particular talents and strengths to the marriage. Each must recognize, appreciate, and surrender to the talents and strengths of the other. Also, each must be willing to give of their talents and strengths for the good of the marriage no matter what the personal sacrifice.

Those who use the addition model fall short of [Yahuwah’s] oneness because they focus more on receiving than giving. Even when they give, it is because they want to receive. Those who follow the subtraction model fall short of [Yahuwah’s] oneness because they do not recognize, appreciate, and surrender to the talents and strengths of the other. Those who follow the division model fall short of [Yahuwah’s] oneness because they are not willing to give of their strengths and talents in a sacrificial and selfless manner. The exponential model is the only one that brings out the ingredients necessary to become one the way [Yahuwah] intended. It accomplishes this because it is the only one that fits [Yahuwah’s] purpose for marriage.

Dave: Now, grab your Bible and turn to Ephesians 5. There’s a verse here we need to talk about. It’s frequently—too frequently, in fact—taken out of context to try and provide Biblical support for enforcing a wrong method of becoming one in a marriage.

Miles: Let me guess: verse 22?

Dave: You guessed it. Actually, read verses 22 through 24 of Ephesians 5 and then we’ll talk about it.

Miles: “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to Yahuwah. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and he is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything.”

Dave: Couples who use this text are typically couples who use the subtraction and addition methods for oneness.

Miles: I’m glad you’re talking about this. There’s a lot of misunderstanding among really sincere, generally very conservative, believers on the passage.

In fact, when our kids were toddlers, my wife joined a forum on line. It was a place where conservative Christian women could go to discuss various parenting issues and get advice and feedback from other mothers.

Well, I remember one evening, she told me about a discussion thread she’d read that really shocked her. Apparently, this one woman had posted that her husband was demanding she join him in doing something that her conscience told her was wrong. This poor woman was really struggling over what to do.

On the one hand, Scripture said for her to obey her husband. On the other, though, she felt what he was demanding she do was a sin. What was she to do?

Dave: So what was her conclusion?

Miles: Well, what shocked my wife was that most of the other women were telling her that she was to go ahead and do what her husband was demanding of her. If I remember correctly, it may have even been illegal. But whatever, they were telling her that the Bible said she had to obey her husband, so she HAD to obey him even if what he told her to do was wrong, but that Yah would “require it of her husband’s hand”—in other words, Yah would place the blame on her husband. But she would be guiltless before Yah because she had done what she was supposed to, which was blindly obey her husband.

Dave: That’s twisted.

Miles: It really is! It’s a Biblical principle that we all stand alone before Yah. We’re all responsible, first and foremost, for our own souls before the Father.

What’s that verse that says, “Though Job or Daniel were in the land, they would only save themselves and no one else”?

Dave: Um … I think you’re thinking of Ezekiel 14 where it says: “Though Noah, Daniel, and Job, were in it, as I live, saith Adonai Yahuwah, they shall deliver neither son nor daughter; they shall but deliver their own souls by their righteousness.” [Ezekiel 14:20]

Miles: Yeah! That’s the one. We’re answerable to Yah for ourselves. The righteousness imputed to one believer, cannot extend to cover the choices of another.

Dave: That’s very true, which is why it is wrong to use this text as a hammer to try and force a wife to comply with her husband’s demands against her will.

Miles: So, are you saying this is just a product of the times? Paul was a product of a patriarchal culture and we can just ignore this passage as his own opinion?

Dave: Not at all.

Now, that’s generally exactly what couples do if they use the division method for becoming one. They reject it as nothing more than Paul’s personal opinion based on the social ideas of the times in which he wrote. But, that’s not right either.

It’s true that the typical way this text is interpreted is not supported by the context of the passage, but it certainly shouldn’t be rejected outright just because it’s so often misinterpreted. We have to go back and look at it in context to understand what Paul is really saying here.

Miles: All right. So what does it mean in context?

Dave: Let’s back up first and look at a widely held assumption.

People assume that while Scripture commands wives to “submit” to their husbands—as in: obey without question—at the same time, husbands are commanded only to “love” their wives.

This isn’t fair! It creates an inequity that opens the door to a great deal of abuse, not to mention resentment.

Miles: Well, yeah. Any wife is going to want to believe her husband loves her, so she’s going to labor under a heavy burden of thinking that she’s sinning when she resents having to “submit,” while all her husband has to do is just “love” her. Basically, nothing, because she believes he already loves her or he wouldn’t have married her.

Dave: Exactly. You’ve summarized it well. But that reasoning is coming from an incorrect understanding of marriage.

The only way to correctly understand this text is by using the exponential model of becoming one. Read verse 22. Just that verse.

Miles: “Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto Yahuwah.”

Dave: Wives are to submit themselves to their husbands … as unto Yahuwah.

Yahuwah never asks anyone to do something morally or legally wrong. In fact, Yahuwah never forces anyone to do anything against his or her will. This is what’s revealed in the instruction to husbands: love your wives just as Yahushua loved the church (or ekklesia: the called out ones) and died for it!

Now, as you pointed out, most women would be quick to say, “My husband loves me enough to die for me!” Every woman wants to believe this of her husband. But that is not what the text means.

By telling husbands to love their wives just as Christ loved the church and gave himself for it, Yah is telling husbands to love their wives enough to guarantee them freedom of choice.

Miles: Wow. That’s quite the opposite of how we’ve been interpreting that text, isn’t it?

Dave: Yahuwah guarantees freedom of choice to everyone. When Adam and Eve sinned, their natures, which had been made like Yahuwah’s, became warped. They became mind-slaves to Satan.

Adam and Eve, and all their descendants after them, would have remained helpless soul-slaves of the devil – IF Yahuwah had not pledged His son to die for sinners.

Miles: Right. That’s what gives everyone a second chance.

Dave: Notice, though, that Yahushua’s death on the cross does not force anyone to be saved against his or her will. Yahushua’s death freed the will of everyone so that they could choose for themselves whom they would serve: Yah or Satan.

In other words, the way in which Yahushua loved the ekklesia was to guarantee her freedom of choice – even though that freedom of choice allowed people to reject Him all over again.

Miles: So, a man who loves his wife as Yahushua loved the ekklesia will never force his wife to do something she doesn’t want to do. If he truly loves his wife like Yahushua loves the ekklesia, he will be willing to die to protect his wife’s freedom of choice – even if he disagrees with her choice.

Dave: That is loving your wife “even as Yahushua also loved the ekklesia and gave Himself for it.”

Under the exponential method of becoming one, it’s safe for women to “submit” to their husbands, showering upon him the same self-less, other-oriented love of Christ, because he’ll never take advantage of that.

Such self-less, godly love is returned to the wife when the husband loves her with the same selfless devotion that Yahushua showed when he gave his life to guarantee freedom of choice for sinners.

Miles: That’s beautiful. It’s a whole new way of looking at it. Makes sense.

Dave: Couples who use the exponential method of becoming one are able to forge a very strong bond. They’re not bound by a need to feel complete, or powerful, or in control or even by the need to feel equal. Their marriage is strong because it’s based on both of them selflessly giving for the good of the other.

Miles: The more each one selflessly gives for the good of the other, the more “they two become one” and the happier they both become.

Dave: This kind of love, and this type of relationship is the strongest of all because it is Yah-centered love. Its highest joy is in giving, generously and self-forgetfully, to the other.

When you love your spouse like Yah loves you, you’re not going to make demands on the other. Instead, you’ll be willing to sacrifice all for the greater good of the other and of the marriage.

Miles: So, where does “submission” fit into this?

Dave: When you love as Yah loves, you’ll never try to force the will of another person.

So, in this context, even submission can be a benefit because it’s viewed in the light of allowing one’s spouse to use his or her Yah-given talents for the greater good of the marriage. This meets the needs of both.

Submission then is based on choice, so it doesn’t make one feel less than equal. Instead, each partner enhances the marriage by using his or her individual gifts and talents. The couple as “one” can appreciate the role of the other in the marriage and the entire relationship benefits.

Miles: That’s beautiful. It really is. And I can see how, with this kind of marriage, Yahuwah is truly glorified and a couple can have a happy, successful marriage. All, when we do things by Yah’s methods.

* * *

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WLC Radio: Teaching minds and preparing hearts for Christ's sudden return.

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* * *Daily Mailbag (Miles & Dave)

Miles: The question from our Daily Mailbag is coming all the way from Waipahu, Hawaii. I think I’m saying the name of the town correctly.

Dave: Let me see … Well, your guess is as good as mine.

Miles: Hawaiian is a really interesting language. I think you’re supposed to say all the vowels, and there’s a lot of them! When Hawaiian is written using the English alphabet, it uses only 12 letters—five of which are vowels! And yet they get these incredibly long words from just 12 letters.

Dave: Interesting. So, what’s our question?

Miles: Well, uh, Lily Hamasaki writes: “Do you have any advice on how to handle stress? It seems the older I get, the more stressful life gets.”

Dave: I’m really glad to have the opportunity to answer this question because she’s right. Life does get more stressful the older we get.

Well, Lily, obviously our answer is always that peace and strength, wisdom and comfort are found in Yahuwah. Let’s start by reading Matthew 11, verses 28 and 29.

Would you read that for us, Miles?

Miles: Sure! [

Ah, yes. Great promise that has comforted a lot of people. It says:

“Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.”

Dave: This is where our greatest peace always comes from. But there are also some concrete things we can do when feeling overwhelmed by life.

Miles: I’m interested in hearing these, too, because she’s right: the older we get, the more challenging life seems to get.

Dave: Well, there are five healthy ways Christians can deal with stress. The first is to recognize the problem. That’s the fastest way to finding a solution: recognize and admit there’s a problem.

This takes courage. You’re going to have to be honest in your self-evaluation. It may require confession.

Miles: But that’s not a bad thing. As the saying goes: “Confession is good for the soul.” There’s nothing like the peace you get that follows confession. Let me read you a couple of verses from Psalm 32. It speaks to this point. It says:

Blessed is he whose transgression is forgiven,
Whose sin is covered.
Blessed is the man to whom Yahuwah does not impute iniquity,
And in whose spirit there is no deceit. [Psalm 32:1-2]

Dave: Once a problem is recognized, we can deal honestly with it and get the help we need, whether that is obtaining spiritual victory, recognizing that we need a new work environment, or other important life changes.

The next point is quit beating yourself up. You’re not perfect. You’re not Super Christian! You’re human!

Miles: Or, as my wife says, “Be gentle on yourself when you’re struggling.”

Dave: That’s a good way to put it. We’re humans living in a fallen world. There are going to be problems here. That’s part of life in a sinful world.

But too often we’re far harder on ourselves than Christ ever is. Remember what he told the woman caught in adultery?

Miles: “Neither do I condemn you, go and sin no more.”

Dave: Right. And his very word gave her the power to do that very thing. My point is: you’re not perfect. The Father knows that and He loves you anyway. That’s why He is always ready to help and to send others to help us as needed.

Miles: That’s good. Having a support system of friends and loved ones can help a lot. You think about it, and even Yahushua had that in the 12 disciples. And of those, he was closest to Peter, James, and John. It’s perfectly acceptable to get help, support, and understanding from others.

Dave: Don’t forget the practical things you can do to combat stress. If you’re not getting enough rest, make sure you start sleeping more. This is very important. Without enough rest, our bodies, minds, and emotions can’t function optimally.

Cut out sweets. Choose healthy foods to fuel your body. Get some exercise. All of these are really important in handling stress.

Miles: What if it’s something bigger, though? For example, if the stress is because you’re dealing with a chronic health issue or the loss of a loved one?

Dave: Well, like your wife says: “Be gentle on yourself.” There’s nothing wrong with slowing down and taking a break from some of your normal responsibilities. It’s okay to give yourself time to heal.

And don’t forget the physical aspect of it. There may be some underlying physiological reason for your stress. That is still just as real. There may be a hormonal or chemical imbalance that a doctor could help with. The closer we get to the end, the further we get from Eden, the more weak and frail the human race has become. These are very real issues that a lot of people have to deal with.

It’s not a sin to admit you need help in one of these areas.

Miles: Of course not! That’s why Yah is glorified. The weakest of the weak are those who glorify Him the most.

Dave: Like Yah told Paul: “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” [2 Corinthians 12:9]

And this brings me to my next point: be instant in prayer.

Whenever you feel overwhelmed by life, by the problems confronting you, by the anxiety keeping you up at night, turn to the Father.

Turn over to Philippians 4 and read verses 6 to 7, would you please? Yah is our ever-present help in trouble and we need to turn to Him for the help He’s willing to give.

Miles: All right. Philippians 4, verses 6 to 7. It says:

Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to Yahuwah; and the peace of Yah, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds through Christ Yahushua.

Dave: That’s a promise! Yahuwah will give you peace that you cannot explain. The problems may still be there, but your spirit will be braced for endurance. He will give you the strength you need to overcome.

Miles: One thing I’ve found that really helps me is to take a verse, a promise that applies to my situation, and just meditate on it. You can type it into your phone, or write it down on a piece of paper and slip in your pocket. Then, when you’ve got a moment throughout the day, pull it out and read it over. Think about what it really means to you. Let your faith grasp that the very words contain the power to fulfill the promise.

I’ve found that really encourages and strengthens me when I’m dealing with stressful situations.

Dave: A great promise to meditate on at bedtime is Psalm 4 verse 8. It says: “I will both lie down in peace, and sleep; for You alone, O Yahuwah, make me dwell in safety.”

Miles: That’s really good. It’s helpful to have memorized for those times you wake up in the middle of the night and can’t get back to sleep, too.

Dave: One final thing you can do in dealing with stress is going to sound counter-intuitive, but give it a chance. It really works.

Miles: What’s that?

Dave: Make a point of spending time being thankful and praising Yah. It is absolutely impossible to be stressed and praise Yah at the same time. You just can’t do it.

Turn on some praise music. Sing along with some hymns. Singing praises is just as much a part of worship as prayer. And, as you begin to praise Yahuwah, His greatness, His love, and His power will overshadow your problems. It’s very faith strengthening to sing praises to Yah.

Miles: One thing I like to do as I’m going to sleep is pray. I think about the day, making a point of focusing on the blessings received during that day. We all receive blessings every single day. But how often do we actually take the time to stop and call them to mind? I’ve found it really helpful to start listing out in my mind all the things I’m grateful for and then I make a point of thanking the Father for those blessings.

Like with praising Him, it reinforces His … bigness, His omnipotence and might, compared to little, old me. It helps keep things in their proper perspective.

Dave: Stress may be a killer, but it isn’t always a bad thing.

Miles: What do you mean? How?

Dave: Well, it can indicate that we’ve quit relying on Yah for strength, help, wisdom, what have you. So, whenever you start feeling stressed, use it as a reminder to pray! Pray very specifically. Ask, specifically, for what you need.

And then praise Him! The problems may still be there, but you’ll be strengthened to bear them. And as Yah’s peace fills you, you’re mind will be clear to know what other steps you need to take.

Miles: Very good. That’s very good advice that I’m going to take to heart, too.

Please keep sending us your questions, comments. We even have a place on our website for prayer requests. We’re in this together, folks. Let’s pray for each other and know that the Saviour walks right by our side every step of the way.

If you’ve got a question or comment, just go to WorldsLastChance.com and click on Contact Us. We always enjoy hearing from our listeners.

* * *Daily Promise

This is Elise O’Brien with your daily promise from Yah’s Word.

John the Beloved has long been known as the disciple Yahushua loved. Of course, the Saviour loved all his disciples, but in a special way, John returned that love with all the devotion of his young heart. In later years, the elderly apostle wrote often of the matchless depths of divine love as revealed through the sacrifice of Yah’s own Son.

In 1 John 3, verse 1, John feels so overwhelmed by the sheer magnitude of divine love that he calls on all to simply stop and behold it, as no mere words can encompass it. He says: “Behold, what manner of love the Father hath bestowed upon us, that we should be called the sons of Yah.”

It is the love of Yah that draws hearts. When you once begin to grasp how very much you are loved, you can’t help but respond! Love awakens love. Christian pastor and author, Rick Warren, wrote, quote: “[Yah’s] love is like an ocean. You can see its beginning, but not its end.”

The Welsh revival of 1904 to 1905 is not well-remembered today, but it was a powerful awakening that spread beyond Wales to reach nearly everywhere on earth. In describing the Welsh revival, J. Edwin Orr writes, quote: “The movement kept the churches of Wales filled for many years to come … Meanwhile, the Awakening swept the rest of Britain, Scandinavia, parts of Europe, North America, the mission fields of India and the Orient, Africa and Latin America." Unquote.

A large part of what gave this revival its power was its emphasis on the love of Yah. One hymn that came to be known as the anthem of the Welsh Revival was called “Here is Love, Vast as the Ocean.”

The lyrics say, in part, quote:

On the mount of crucifixion
Fountains opened deep and wide
Through the floodgates of [Yah’s] mercy
Flowed a vast a gracious tide,
Grace and love, like mighty rivers
Poured incessant from above
And Heav'n's peace and perfect justice
Kissed a guilty world in love.Who His love will not remember?
Who can cease to sing His praise?
He can never be forgotten
Throughout Heav'n's eternal days!

In the third chapter of Jeremiah, the aged prophet wrote: “Yahuwah hath appeared of old unto me, saying, Yea, I have loved thee with an everlasting love: therefore with lovingkindness have I drawn thee.” [Jeremiah 31:3]

We’ve been given great and precious promises. Go, and start claiming!

* * *Part 3: (Miles & Dave)

Miles: I’ve really enjoyed today’s discussion and I’ve learned a lot. I love my wife. We’ve got a great marriage. But, yeah. I can see how we’ve been using the division form of marriage to become one. But the exponential form. Wow! What potential for joy and closeness! It’s like all Yah’s blessings: they’re shaken together, pressed down, and running over!

Dave: They really are. There are special blessings held in reserve for those who do things Yah’s way.

There’s a point that’s important to make though, and that is that even the best model of marriage will only work if both partners are individually committed to Yahuwah. This only happens through daily surrender to Yah.

If you’re trying to base your marriage on the exponential model at the same time your spouse is using one of the other three models, you’re going to have problems. At best you’ll feel taken advantage of and used; at worst, you might even be abused.

Miles: That’s a very good point. It takes both partners loving each other selflessly in order to have a strong, healthy, loving marriage. But, it only takes one to keep that from happening.

Dave: And this brings us back full circle: the only reason a person should get married is if he or she knows that it is Yahuwah’s will. The only safe course for anyone, single or married, is to individually seek to follow Yahuwah’s will in your own life.

Whether you’re engaged or only thinking about getting married, whether you’re in a good marriage or a bad one, if you will surrender your will to your Maker, He will guide you in safe paths.

Miles: I think Proverbs 3, verses 5 and 6 say it best: “Trust in Yahuwah with all thine heart; and lean not unto thine own understanding. In all thy ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct thy paths.”

We hope you join us again tomorrow, and until then, remember: Yahuwah loves you . . . and He is safe to trust!

* * *

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This program and past episodes of WLC Radio are available for downloading on our website. They're great for sharing with friends and for use in Bible studies! They're also an excellent resource for those worshipping Yahuwah alone at home. To listen to previously aired programs, visit our website at WorldsLastChance.com. Click on the WLC Radio icon displayed on our homepage.

In his teachings and parables, the Savior gave no “signs of the times” to watch for. Instead, the thrust of his message was constant … vigilance. Join us again tomorrow for another truth-filled message as we explore various topics focused on the Savior's return and how to live in constant readiness to welcome him warmly when he comes.

WLC Radio: Teaching minds and preparing hearts for Christ's sudden return.